Zezima parody
by Dudeincar
Summary: this is a story i did a few days ago, used to be a weekly thing i did for some friends 3 guys kiling and being killed by runescape top player who wasnt banned


This was written in several parts over a year, and was a parody of zezima stories, It was origionaly a weekly sidebar i did for clan tunescape, it is done, but has no ending, so in you review, you may add to it if you must, but only make one story adition, ok? i'll be enjoying my rootbeer and listening to my i-pod in the background. 

-Authors note1: Each of these chunks were done independantly -Authors note2: My fried edits these, and did a poor job, he changed the words "zezima", and "noob" to lama.

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zezima fell to the ground, having just realized he was beaten "-how? how? i have the highest skills, full health, and the best armor and weapons ever..-" he thought as he fell to the ground for the final time... as i inspected the corpese i called nightzammord and hourous0 over to take a few things like fraging dagers and zammy items.. he droped these thing that remained after my most truted player and peoiple i know filled thir inventorys: a dragonstone anny, dragon long, dragon chain, zammy legs, dragon square, 1000mill, sharks,and a lot of soul runes. the soul runes diden't make sense sice they do nothing alone, when sudenly, the already rotting body behidme violently jerked up as i took the runes from the pouch tied to his waist and swiftly droped them into my backpick, they fell with a clan at the same moment that he jerkud upright, still sitting.

now i thought, i was low on health, he had few sharks left after the assault by me, hourus and zammy. my health was dangerously low, and i hav no runes to cast crumble undead. suddenly, the jaw sifted open in a swirling motion and without moving the sound "speak now, he who profanes the light seemed to echo though my head , tearing at my soul, though i had no idea of what it ment at all...

(this part was added by my friend, who is my editor, he wanted to put a game referance in, i dont like it but if you guess what game this part connects to, post it in a review please)  
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as i looked onward, i say that the level magicly floating over his head was said "the highest level that can hurt you in the level of wildy ur in"... wtf? i had just set my chat to frends so i didnt have to hear his moaning, and now this? i decided i would have to try somthing diffrent, sadly, most of my ideas were impossibe, we are all doomed to be unable to sit, look up or anything else like that. so i noticed that in another newly opened holew in his quickly decaying "skins" sata bottle of super weapon poison, i graped it along with the last black dragonskin clothes. i quickly dumped the contents of the bottle onto my dagger and it suddeny was stained a sick green as i threw it tword zez's zombie, it healed him and i reallized hurting him makes him heal, he's a undead guy.. when it cudent gewt any worse, there were several greaters behind him, (in a multi - zone) and it killed them just by the toutch, um, is this dude invicibe or somthing? i then looked up again, and equipted the dragon armor. but as i slashed the halebard though it... it had possesd the greater closesed to him and it was a level 245!  
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now, im this tale i am level 60 in all combat stats, so even now i am no match for this thing, as a tumbleweed rolled past, (wtf?) and dust blew at my face fogging my vew of the burning effigy to what was once a greater deamon, i screamed and whiped out the silverlight... and as i leared how to the the deralith thing, (baby demon, lets call him derlaith lol) i imedeatly re-equipted the bow and used the silverlight in it, and it turned into a "xxx#'s silverlight arrows. now , even i did not have a clue if this is some dilluded fantasy made by a guy writing my fate with the newly-descovered graphite(the lead stuff in pencils lol) i began shooting then on rapid with the crossbow, and the beemed to mearge with the um, thing. it seemed to be working untill, it hit a ten on me, i ate a shark, it hit a twenty, i ate a sea turtle from the fishing bout thing i did a while back... and after its health was down to 1 or so, a giant hole opened up and i fell in, and saw a symbol on a buning red stone altair, looked like this/--/ . i realized oit was the symbol of a newer and slightly pointless government of greaterdeamons that involed a lot of eating of human., and my origional peices of the plintered silverlight was stabbed into the center. when i pulled it out, suddenly a spiraling staircase going up to the surface, and the cavern began to colapese, as i fled i thought i saw the zez/greater/zombie thing melt into zamorack.  
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now, by this time, zez had come back probably thinking i was too llamaish to wait and grap his stuf. i was dieing, everything wasfading into shades of grey and warping around. whan i saw the worst thing that could ever happen to add to this virtual hell... llama! i tried to eat, but i was too wear so all i could do is pray, pray that i might survive, and not be consumed by this darkness aready surroundin me.  
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I (my charachter died here)  
-  
... this chapter of the story starts just moments before my death, zezim (the now respawned in lumby one) saw my frends off in the didstance wearing his armor. with death in his eyes, he stormed off to endthe lives of his other killers.  
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(by now, i am dead, i had lag, and so i am not in the story right now)  
zezima found hourus0 and nightzammork in the church nearby the wilderness, and approching the rotted oak doors, he thought for a secont (gasp! lol he has a brain? lol) he should evesdrop on where they (the 2 living clan members)  
will go next. (he eavssdroping now:)

shuffling and murmered voices by others  
NIGHTZAMMORK-so, uh... whada we do now?  
HOURUS0-um, well, he said he was having lag a lot, so it could be a while.  
NIGHTZAMMORK-ok, so u wanna go to that bar by the wilderness?  
HOURUS0-kk door creaks open and hits zez on the head, they dont notice, zez takes 3 damage (yay!)

"bartender dude, give us a a lotta beers "  
how many?  
"um, i have 5k on me"  
(the bar guy gives them a few of those barels that never run dry, unlike kegs)  
(it turns out that they didnt get drunk for some reason, but later they woke up with a headache like hell, i mean it lol)  
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charging at full spead, if possible, was what he did, crunching the digital leaves, tearing up the pixilated scentless dirt, he simply passed through them, and continued intil he was stoped by the gate he ran into, so of course, my friends decide to go to the bar near the wilderness, they paid the bar-dude 5gp, and got a room, after tdrinking many bitter, cheap beers, they decided to stop drinking, they descovered you cannot become drunken here, and went to sleep.  
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(this next part was writen by my editor)  
the next day, our two friends woke up to the sound of cake being eaten, and both cartoonishly jolted foreward banging their heads on the low ceiling. :) after doning their armor and getting otu various other stuff to cram into their backpacks, hourous notices a small cube and without caring, tosed it into his bag. they went to the exit, finding themselves surrounded by a group wearing black priest robes and black full helms, who aparently had a dragon 2-hander melded to their mottled florecent blue-green hands.  
gievve uss thee boxssss... said the one who was apparently in charge, wearing a zammy black full helm and had the D-2h slung over his back and and two massive dragon battleaxes in his hands, th ewhole image was almost comical, bu tseemed to be almost enough to kill by its looks alone. zammy(nightzammork, one of our 2 guys) ran up to him and wtf is with you? move over! the robed creature was about to clam him with both axes at once, witch zammy could see were poisioned after being within range. Suddenly; thre ground sunk inwars and pushed out in other od places eventualy creating and an almost bottomless chasam, spewing about 20 almost-druid ish things. the pit closed.  
the things levitated, wore white robes with green patterns etched all across, creating an al around image of calmness ont eh spot where they hovered. siddenly we seemed to fade out, just observers of a battle,  
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End file.
